We as military spouses

The past few weeks have been mentally challenging. Someone had posted a link to a blog from a military spouse who was basically writing her goodbye. She had planned on taking her own life because she felt thrown out by the military and her spouse. Thank God she is alive and getting help she needs. She spoke of her spouses homecoming and their moving to a new post and then the bottom falling out. Him ignoring her, him refusing to get help he needed, her being told she was basically useless because the post they were at was temporary. Then last week I was informed of another spouse, a military widow who had taken her own life and left behind 3 children.

People need to realize that just because some of us do not work outside the home, have children to care for, or do work, we are human beings also. We not only take care of our houses, spouses, children, pets and worry about our families back home, wherever home may be. We not only put our needs last, we are constantly helping our spouses. We are travel arrangers, moving specialist, vets, care takers and above all we worry constantly about our spouses rather they are with us or not. We help with careers, educational needs and mental health. We also look out for our children education because chances are we are not stationed in an area that gives our kids the education they need or deserve, so therefore we give up careers to make sure they are taken care of.

People who are in positions to help us say they will but in reality they do not. They say what looks good in the news. If they wanted to really help they would take the time to actually sit down and talk to more than just a few of us.

We stand beside our spouses and we support them with all that we have yet there are some who give military spouses a bad reputation and for that we are all labeled which we should not be. We love and support our families and we support the military because that is the path our spouses have chosen. We may not like, or better yet, we despise deployments but we know it is part of the job. We are strong people who thank God everyday for another day with our loved ones and with our friends rather they be person to person or on line. Some of my best friends are ones I have not met but I feel closer to them.

Our lives are not like the TV shows. We have feelings too, we have worries, we have guilt, we suffer from loneliness, anger, depression, anxiety and sometimes severe medical problems that knock the wind out of us but we suck it up and we continue on. Not that it is easy and because we enjoy pity parties but because we are military spouses and we are strong!! People need to remember that when our spouses come home from deployments we are more than over joyed but we are also on the look out for any problems that may arise. I am not saying that in the civilian world there aren't problems because God knows there are a ton but we have a different outlook on things. To a lot of us we really don't care about who has a better car or whose house is bigger, we care that our loved ones and the loved ones of our friends come home safe. We pray daily for people we have never met and more likely will never meet but that is what we do.

As military spouses day approaches the greatest thing anyone can do is to say "Thank You" to a spouse and let them know that you are thinking of them and care. We don't do what we do for recognition, we do it for love!!

Many of us literally have to fight for the medical care our spouses receive. It is just handed to them, we have to go to battle for it and when we do some people have the gall to make light of what we do and think that some are just "playing" the system. If you have ever had to watch a loved one flinch when they hear a loud noise, can't remember something that happened 10 minutes ago, can't watch certain shows because of what they have been through, be gone for months and months at a time with little to no communication and still maintain a relationship you will never know what it is like. A lot of people are very quick to remind us that our spouses volunteered for this life and yes they did but if they hadn't where would you be right now? It is people like our spouses that make us so proud that we cry when we hear the National Anthem, cry when we see Welcome Home Banners even though we don't know the people.

I am not writing all of this out of pity, I am writing this because a lot has been on my mind lately and this is the best way for me to get it out. I love my husband and I will continue to support him no matter what and I will continue to volunteer my help where needed, I will make sure our daughter gets the education she deserves, take care of the pets, clean the house, do the laundry, cook, grocery shop and all the while will continue to pray and support our military and the spouses.